Um...nope the title of this blog does not describe me. At all. I'm blessed -AND- stressed thank you very much!!
I'm sitting here on the floor of my bedroom, looking around...and trying to figure out how it is that I cleaned in this room for 3 hours today...yet somehow it looks worse than it did when I started...hmmm...how do these things happen?
I dug out a bunch of stuff we don't need/want...I sold a little bit of it, gave a lot of it away, and I'm giving more away tomorrow. I picked up a few last minute Christmas presents for people...I got my groceries for the food I'm making for Christmas dinner...
I'm just so done with this holiday. I know that sounds awful but honestly...this kind of crap is NOT what Christmas is about. Trees and gifts and food and pretty lights are all wonderful...but seriously...if that's all you're in this holiday for, you've completely missed the point. This season is ALL about symbolism...giving to each other...the way God gave us the gift of Jesus, and salvation...that's the point. We give to each other not because we have to, not because we are obligated to by some social standard...we should be giving because we love the person we're giving a gift to. We want to see their face light up when they see what stood out among all the other things in a store and screamed "this was MADE for my friend/aunt/sister/mother/father/brother/etc" and you just HAD to get it for them because of how you knew that gift would fill their heart...at least that is what this season means to me.
I got the best gift in the world this Christmas. I got a daughter. I would never admit it...but I've always secretly wanted a little girl. I'm a total tomboy, alway have been...probably always will be...but the thought of missing out on the joy of being a mother to a little girl always made me sad. I can't wait to play barbies, doll her up in hello kitty from head to toe, put bows in her hair, bake cookies in her EZ bake oven...yes I know she has down syndrome....and I won't be raising a daughter in the most "traditional" sense of the word...but I plan on putting no barriers up for Natasha. She will be free to learn and grow and develop at her own pace, and I have a feeling our little fighter is going to surprise us all!
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